My friend, I have always been a procrastinator.

I vividly remember waking up at my boyfriend’s place at university, bleary eyed and craving salt from too many drinks the night before, looking at the 7:15 am staring back at me on the clock, knowing I had a 9 am class to catch…

…with a paper on Anthony Giddens due to be submit on arrival.

While I don’t remember a damn thing about Anthony Giddens, I do remember the “oh shit” feeling that threw me into the stress, pressure, and chaos of whipping up an essay in an hour and 36 minutes, then running to class to hand it in.

It’s not like I didn’t know about the essay; I didn’t even forget about the essay: I have always been a planner.

It’s not unlike me to plan dinner while I’m having breakfast, plan our next date while we’re literally on a date, and my favourite – plan a vacation while I’m on a vacation.

Overplanning has always felt like a comfort blanket I used to cope with the chaos of my childhood.

But weirdly, it felt like I could plan on writing this essay for days of not weeks – then leave it till the very last possible moment, throwing me under the weight of last minute anxiety to H-U-S-T-L-E…then get a sick rush of endorphins from the high that brought. 

Truth bomb time, my friend!!

We are wired for self-sabotage. 

Personally I was told for so long growing up that I wasn’t smart and wouldn’t amount to anything (and would always have to rely on someone else to pay my bills) that my 42 and a half year old self can look back empathetically on my 19 and a half year old self and observe that this endless loop of procrastination / beat myself up for leaving it so long / repeat was an unconscious ploy to make that story come true:

If I left it all till the last minute, I would likely get a bad grade, which would confirm all the stories they told me to be true about myself – and I wouldn’t have to face the reality that I am really smart, and capable of far more than either of my parents would have lead you to believe.

I am not the only one who has a story to tell like this.

In my near decade of speaking, leadership consulting, and performance coaching, working with leaders and teams across the globe, one thing remains consistent across age, profession, and location:

Our ability to hold ourselves back from getting to where we want to be.

Our brain is designed to keep us safe, doing what we’ve always done – because that feels easy, and easy feels good.

That means every time we get close to stepping outside our comfort zone, our unconscious and internal alarm system goes off and causes us to do, think, and say things that will surely keep us where we are, which looks like one of these four P’s:

• Perfectionism
• Procrastination
• People Pleasing
• Performance Anxiety

So now imagine reaching the peak of your career, only to discover you’ve set up camp on a battleground of self-sabotage.

We. All. Do. This.

Especially (and ironically), the overachievers among us.

It doesn’t feel “great,” and it happens to all of us, at every stage of our career (and cough, personal life), present company included. 

In my pillars of “Becoming a Good, Enough Leader,” I’ve broken down the 4 P’s of self-sabotage that hold even the most accomplished leaders back (louder for the cheap seats in the back):

• Perfectionism
• Procrastination
• People Pleasing
• Performance Anxiety

We all have (at least) one that tends to be our default:

Which one of the 4 P’s is your “go-to” method of self-sabotage?

Book a call with me now and let’s talk strategy in how we get you out of self-sab mode, so you can live, lead, and succeed on your terms.

Leisse